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Author Topic: Tough chapters hit  (Read 359 times)

Burners

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Tough chapters hit
« on: July 02, 2018, 08:53:11 am »
So I went away for a weekend with my mother, always fraught.

Now it's looking like my (very long term) relationship is on the rocks. Different views about having family, marriage and time together. Starting to think about moving out (even though we both have executive jobs at the same company) as I choose between the person I love and the family I want to have.

He spent the night in a hotel.

But, somehow - I haven't smoked! I really, really thought about it but decided piling physical abuse on myself at a time I need to take care wasn't going to happen.

Non-smoking life commenced: 19th April 2018.
Smoking history: 17 years' chainsmoking - 10 v quiet day, 20 typical, 40 easy on a boozy night - and there were many, many boozy nights. Weapon of choice: roll ups.
Quit weapon of choice: cold turkey, hot baths, this forum!
 

tea

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Re: Tough chapters hit
« Reply #1 on: July 02, 2018, 11:28:56 am »
Blooming well done. I agree with you. At times like this you need to spoil yourself and think about what you want in the future, because it's too easy to revert to past behaviour. What will you do to cheer yourself up instead?


ps Am volunteeering to join you if it involves shoes or handbags.
12.9.2014  (I forget sometimes)
 
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Skiddaw

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Re: Tough chapters hit
« Reply #2 on: July 02, 2018, 01:14:43 pm »
I think that quitting can sometimes be the catalyst to make other life-changing decisions dear @Burners. Knowing you have the will power to chose not to smoke any longer does all sorts of wonderful things for your self-confidence and self-esteem. Good luck whatever you ultimately decide- it'll be the right decision for you I am certain.  :hug:
Finally saw sense on 8/12/13

So many mountains, so little time...
 
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Burners

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Re: Tough chapters hit
« Reply #3 on: July 02, 2018, 04:33:07 pm »
Haha @tea that's a great idea!

@Skiddaw you are so right. Your tolerance for things that are bad for you / lens on life does seem to change.
Non-smoking life commenced: 19th April 2018.
Smoking history: 17 years' chainsmoking - 10 v quiet day, 20 typical, 40 easy on a boozy night - and there were many, many boozy nights. Weapon of choice: roll ups.
Quit weapon of choice: cold turkey, hot baths, this forum!
 

Sally

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Re: Tough chapters hit
« Reply #4 on: July 02, 2018, 05:01:50 pm »
Take care of yourself @Burners and be proud of yourself for dealing with the tough times without a cigarette.
Quit date - 1st October 2014, Quit method - lozenges

 
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Enough42

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Re: Tough chapters hit
« Reply #5 on: July 03, 2018, 05:14:31 am »
Wow that sounds tough indeed. Massive well done for realising that having a cigarette is not going to make ANYTHING better. Hugs going out to you for your tough times though. We are around if you need us!
Kicked It on Wednesday, 1 November 2017 at 9am
 
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Nicky40

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Re: Tough chapters hit
« Reply #6 on: July 03, 2018, 02:02:56 pm »
Sorry to hear you are having a tough time at the moment @Burners but you have done so well not to smoke.  Relationship issues was my reason (excuse) for my previous quit failing.  This time I know it isn't worth it.  :hug:
Smoked for most of my adult life (and a fair bit of my childhood!).  Managed a two year quit 2014-2016 but started again!  Quit again on 6th January 2018 and lasted 7 months!  Back on the wagon again now...........
 
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markmcclean1980

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Re: Tough chapters hit
« Reply #7 on: July 03, 2018, 11:31:25 pm »
@Burners very well done on getting through such a bad patch without giving in.  It shows the determination you have to succeed.  You know you can get through major stuff, which is great.  So sorry that you are having problems and sending happy thoughts your way.
 
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Burners

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Re: Tough chapters hit
« Reply #8 on: July 07, 2018, 04:51:29 am »
Thanks so much everyone!

So, lots of hospital time this week, seemingly endless pints of blood being drawn, seems like it's going to be around 6 months at least until I'm better, relationship still looking like it's going to break apart and heading into work shows a direct report has taken my desk in a peculiar power move.

My life is completely falling apart.

But somehow, still,
I have not smoked
Non-smoking life commenced: 19th April 2018.
Smoking history: 17 years' chainsmoking - 10 v quiet day, 20 typical, 40 easy on a boozy night - and there were many, many boozy nights. Weapon of choice: roll ups.
Quit weapon of choice: cold turkey, hot baths, this forum!
 

Skiddaw

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Re: Tough chapters hit
« Reply #9 on: July 07, 2018, 10:02:05 am »
Oh @Burners ....So sorry you're going through such a difficult time. It does always seem to be the way, doesn't it, that if one thing goes south so does everything else. You're being such a star in sticking to your guns despite everything (and you're quite right- smoking wouldn't make it any better). You'll come out the other side of all this and be all the stronger for it.  :hug: :hug: :hug:
Finally saw sense on 8/12/13

So many mountains, so little time...
 

tea

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Re: Tough chapters hit
« Reply #10 on: July 07, 2018, 02:13:42 pm »
Thanks so much everyone!

So, lots of hospital time this week, seemingly endless pints of blood being drawn, seems like it's going to be around 6 months at least until I'm better, relationship still looking like it's going to break apart and heading into work shows a direct report has taken my desk in a peculiar power move.

My life is completely falling apart.

But somehow, still,
I have not smoked

.....because you're strong, independent and motivated.
12.9.2014  (I forget sometimes)
 
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Enough42

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Re: Tough chapters hit
« Reply #11 on: July 08, 2018, 06:52:35 am »
Hi @Burners. I’m not sure what is going on with the medical stuff but I hope you are okay.  As for the rest of the stuff going on, you’re not going to let that get in the way of doing yourself the biggest kindness you could ever do - looking after your physical well being.  The other stuff is just “stuff” and there are plenty of people in this world who can be happy without “stuff” and I know you can be one of them.  So don’t let that B/S get you down.  Keep on your path and have a think about what sort of ”stuff” is important enough for you to want to have to worry about it in your life. PS well done for sticking it to Mr Nic when he’s right there tapping on your shoulder.....again.
Kicked It on Wednesday, 1 November 2017 at 9am
 
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Sally

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Re: Tough chapters hit
« Reply #12 on: July 08, 2018, 08:59:45 am »
Whatever happens, we're all here for you.  Wishing you a speedy recovery and hoping all that's going on in your life gets resolved and there are calmer days ahead for you.

Quit date - 1st October 2014, Quit method - lozenges

 
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Indigo Warrior

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Re: Tough chapters hit
« Reply #13 on: July 08, 2018, 08:44:52 pm »
You are amazing to stay off the wicked nicotine even though all these challenges are being thrown at you. Karma will take this on board and once normality resumes, you can (if you are lucky) get to watch the payback with extra.
Nicotine free since 22nd August, 2015
 
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